Two Weeks in the Classroom
It has officially been two weeks since I entered the classroom at my summer school site. It has truly been a rollercoaster.
I'm currently sitting in the Barnes and Noble on 7th after walking from happy hour a few blocks down. At school, when we plan our Friday hangouts across from school, we call it "adult coffee." We break rules and meet up with the young supervisors from the program at happy hour anyway, so I guess it really doesn't matter.
Every minute of every day in this program is filled with something. My anxiety and stress are through the roof. I sweat so much because of the constant anxiety that I get lightheaded. I remember telling myself in stressful times throughout college that this was the busiest I had ever been, but I take that all back. I have never worked such long and arduous days, and with this much perseverance and brain power in my life. It's so worth it when you get into the classroom. Even when the students scream and don't want to do anything or grab your arm and try to set you off so that they won't have to do work....it's worth it for the moments that you see them apply what they know. And then they apply what you've taught them. I almost cried during a lesson on one of my first days of teaching. I was teaching a lesson on the coins- quarter, nickel, dime penny. I had no idea how to communicate with students who cannot speak and only use pointing and gestures to say what they want to say. It's really hard. I had been going around the room asking students to point to the quarter- I had a quarter in one hand and a penny in the other. "Which one is the quarter? Point to the quarter?" It took about 6 students before one of them took me seriously and pointed to the quarter. Let me tell you though, that it's not that the 5 students before this one had not known which one was the quarter.
They knew which one was the quarter, but I was a new face in the classroom. They had no trust in me. They didn't know who I was. Why would they point to the quarter for a woman they had no relationship with?
I went home and had nightmares that night of myself saying "Point to the quarter" for the rest of eternity and never having anyone point to the quarter.
Every night before the next day we receive a schedule in our email with our RCS schedule and happenings for the next day. Everyone has a different schedule that was created by their "home coach" (main supervisor/lead critique-giver). There are never more than 4 minutes of a break between sessions, and if your body naturally creates urine and you have to pee, well that's too bad. Oh, I should mention that there is no toilet paper or soap in the bathroom. Sometimes there's paper towels though. It's a crapshoot. That's how high-need these schools in New York City are. When someone in my session raised her hand and asked my lead advisor to tell the janitor that we need toilet paper, she quiet literally said "You're working in a public school. There is no toilet paper. There will never be toilet paper."
We all showed up the next day with bottles of soap (antibacterial of course) and rolls of TP that we snuck from our apartments. I even rearranged the immaculate toilet paper stack in my bathroom so that my roommates wouldn't notice.
Now onto what really matters: the students.
These kids are unbelievable in so many ways. My group of 12 is so many things. They're smart, manipulative, nonverbal, happy, tired, you name it. Some have experienced severe trauma and are temporarily living in homeless shelters or group homes due to their disabilities. Others wake up in the comfort of their own homes and have someone there to wipe their ass and brush their teeth in the morning while they're fed through a tube. Others are the happiest children I've ever met, despite never being able to speak a word to anyone. Some love when I put my face close to theirs and smile to say good morning, and others have never looked me in the eyes. One of my students is from an Asian culture. In many Asian cultures, it is shameful to have a child with disabilities, especially if he is a male. In the most severe cases, these boys are sent away so that the family will not endure shame. I take his presence as a blessing and I'm lucky to have him in my class. I am working on building trust with him, but it has been a bit of a struggle.
On one of the first days of teaching we had a session all about treating every student the same and never picking favorites. That all went out the window on one of the first days. Some students I feel more gravitated towards. This is human nature. I accept it, but I will never allow it to alter my classroom culture. In my room, every student has an equal chance at success and every student deserves an equitable education. That's what I'm here to give to them.
Everyday you walk in and you wonder what you're going to get today. The mood is different every single day. You have to be agile as a special education teacher. You have to have a plan for every minute that you're in front of the room, and they have to be plans that you know will work. As my training director has said every day, you can plan and plan and plan until your blue in the face, but do you have a plan? I do, and I stay up until midnight writing those plans. Then I get up at 5:30 and I do it all over again.
There's so much going on in this program that I could write forever, but I have to write 4 lesson plans for the upcoming week. To align with the unit curriculum, I've decided to focus on inventions this week. Monday we will learn about Benjamin Franklin. Did you know that he invented swimming fins? He used to wear them on his hands before they were made for our feet.
I'm creating graphics and a sorting game for the SmartBoard which the kids love. Tuesday is a day to learn about another inventor- but I'm not sure who yet. I want to choose a female inventor so I am going to do my research tonight and pick a special lady.
Signing off,
Excited and Exhausted
I'm currently sitting in the Barnes and Noble on 7th after walking from happy hour a few blocks down. At school, when we plan our Friday hangouts across from school, we call it "adult coffee." We break rules and meet up with the young supervisors from the program at happy hour anyway, so I guess it really doesn't matter.
Every minute of every day in this program is filled with something. My anxiety and stress are through the roof. I sweat so much because of the constant anxiety that I get lightheaded. I remember telling myself in stressful times throughout college that this was the busiest I had ever been, but I take that all back. I have never worked such long and arduous days, and with this much perseverance and brain power in my life. It's so worth it when you get into the classroom. Even when the students scream and don't want to do anything or grab your arm and try to set you off so that they won't have to do work....it's worth it for the moments that you see them apply what they know. And then they apply what you've taught them. I almost cried during a lesson on one of my first days of teaching. I was teaching a lesson on the coins- quarter, nickel, dime penny. I had no idea how to communicate with students who cannot speak and only use pointing and gestures to say what they want to say. It's really hard. I had been going around the room asking students to point to the quarter- I had a quarter in one hand and a penny in the other. "Which one is the quarter? Point to the quarter?" It took about 6 students before one of them took me seriously and pointed to the quarter. Let me tell you though, that it's not that the 5 students before this one had not known which one was the quarter.
They knew which one was the quarter, but I was a new face in the classroom. They had no trust in me. They didn't know who I was. Why would they point to the quarter for a woman they had no relationship with?
I went home and had nightmares that night of myself saying "Point to the quarter" for the rest of eternity and never having anyone point to the quarter.
Every night before the next day we receive a schedule in our email with our RCS schedule and happenings for the next day. Everyone has a different schedule that was created by their "home coach" (main supervisor/lead critique-giver). There are never more than 4 minutes of a break between sessions, and if your body naturally creates urine and you have to pee, well that's too bad. Oh, I should mention that there is no toilet paper or soap in the bathroom. Sometimes there's paper towels though. It's a crapshoot. That's how high-need these schools in New York City are. When someone in my session raised her hand and asked my lead advisor to tell the janitor that we need toilet paper, she quiet literally said "You're working in a public school. There is no toilet paper. There will never be toilet paper."
We all showed up the next day with bottles of soap (antibacterial of course) and rolls of TP that we snuck from our apartments. I even rearranged the immaculate toilet paper stack in my bathroom so that my roommates wouldn't notice.
Now onto what really matters: the students.
These kids are unbelievable in so many ways. My group of 12 is so many things. They're smart, manipulative, nonverbal, happy, tired, you name it. Some have experienced severe trauma and are temporarily living in homeless shelters or group homes due to their disabilities. Others wake up in the comfort of their own homes and have someone there to wipe their ass and brush their teeth in the morning while they're fed through a tube. Others are the happiest children I've ever met, despite never being able to speak a word to anyone. Some love when I put my face close to theirs and smile to say good morning, and others have never looked me in the eyes. One of my students is from an Asian culture. In many Asian cultures, it is shameful to have a child with disabilities, especially if he is a male. In the most severe cases, these boys are sent away so that the family will not endure shame. I take his presence as a blessing and I'm lucky to have him in my class. I am working on building trust with him, but it has been a bit of a struggle.
On one of the first days of teaching we had a session all about treating every student the same and never picking favorites. That all went out the window on one of the first days. Some students I feel more gravitated towards. This is human nature. I accept it, but I will never allow it to alter my classroom culture. In my room, every student has an equal chance at success and every student deserves an equitable education. That's what I'm here to give to them.
Everyday you walk in and you wonder what you're going to get today. The mood is different every single day. You have to be agile as a special education teacher. You have to have a plan for every minute that you're in front of the room, and they have to be plans that you know will work. As my training director has said every day, you can plan and plan and plan until your blue in the face, but do you have a plan? I do, and I stay up until midnight writing those plans. Then I get up at 5:30 and I do it all over again.
There's so much going on in this program that I could write forever, but I have to write 4 lesson plans for the upcoming week. To align with the unit curriculum, I've decided to focus on inventions this week. Monday we will learn about Benjamin Franklin. Did you know that he invented swimming fins? He used to wear them on his hands before they were made for our feet.
I'm creating graphics and a sorting game for the SmartBoard which the kids love. Tuesday is a day to learn about another inventor- but I'm not sure who yet. I want to choose a female inventor so I am going to do my research tonight and pick a special lady.
Signing off,
Excited and Exhausted
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